Product of grace – 11 years in
It’s been eleven years today.
Around year eight I found myself wondering how we’d even get to nine.
But here we are.
Our union a product of grace, miracles and the faithful work of the God we love.
Absolute bliss marrying my high school sweetheart.
Then absolute real life…not bad. Just real.
Real hurt. Real joy. Real struggle.
Growing and changing. Like it or not.
Life always surprises.
Babies blessed us.
They stretched us. In every way.
Work became something difficult.
Difficult became disillusionment.
Disillusionment became distance.
Distance became two people raising a handful of children who didn’t know how to love each other anymore.
We found our way back.
We found things to enjoy together and our hearts slowly unfroze.
We changed more than we thought possible.
God changed us, He still is. We can’t take credit for making it. It was and is beyond our ability.
Now, driving in the car today, I heard these precious words:
Man, I sure wish dad was here in the car with us. Want to know why? (everyone says yes) Because if dad were here, we could watch them play that kissing game. I love that. Mama, if Daddy were here, you could put your coffee cup up and hide behind it and kiss him! Or you could use this book too…(giggling then ensued)
Not long ago, we never played that game. They were more likely to hear harsh words than to see their parents smooching in the car. They were more likely to see anger than tenderness. That’s the honest truth. Life hurt a lot and we became adept at hurting each other.
My heart smiled today as I listened to my children chatter in the van.
We are learning and growing and loving and messing up and living in grace.
More now than ever.
And there is so much more to come.