Delighting in daughters
Her blanket is in the van and its dark and late and my foot has a tiny piece of glass in it and I don’t want to limp outside to get it. She is too tired to argue so she gently takes my hand and cradles her cheek with my palm just like she would with her blankie. She holds on to my other hand with her tiny one and I watch her eyes flutter. Mine keep closing from a longer than most day of the hardest work. But I will them back open to make sure I don’t miss getting to watch her fall asleep.
There is something delicious and other-worldly about little girls. Her lips are a perfect tiny rosebud and her curls hang all around her face. She reaches out to touch things that aren’t there and makes the softest little sounds as she drifts off. Her skin is unblemished and untouched by age and I soak in all that she is in this moment. She possesses a tender, sweet spirit and I pray for it and her to be protected in all the years to come. That somehow she can cultivate and grow in her feminine, soft loveliness in this ever-so-mixed up world.
The older daughter, my first born, she has this intangible ability to sense how people feel around her. Maybe that’s why she went to all the effort today to set up a tea party in the family room for us girls. She thought of everything. Put Ray LaMontagne on the CD player and a fan on for ambient noise. Tried to light candles but couldn’t find a lighter. Put a table cloth over the old card table and sprinkled rose petals from the yard all over the table. She played two roles even, server/waitress and the friend joining us who was running late. She switched between roles throughout our lunch. Made sure to tell me I would be so impressed by the baker who’d made our cookies we were eating “she has FIVE kids, can you believe it? and she made these delicious cookies and they are gluten free!” I grinned big and marveled at her nine year old self, play acting and still managing to compliment me in the most darling fashion. There were even little umbrellas in our iced tea! I rode the happy of our tea all day long. I replayed it all over and over and was unceasingly thankful that I am blessed with these two daughters.